Remember how we met back then,
Deer caught in headlights, you wouldn’t let me in…
I tried so hard, till you caved in…
Four years ago but seems like a million,
Put you on a pedestal, always let you win…
Don’t let my words crowd your mind,
This writing won’t limit or define,
All the things you meant to me,
And all the ways you set me free.
Made from nothing, you were everything,
Closed off my mind, let you steer the wind.
Back then I was the raven who’d lost her wings,
See she’d broken me, and so had he,
A Pretty bird no longer by her cage defined,
Just a long lost Raven who’d forgotten how to fly…
I needed a sail, handed you the reigns…
Raven, poor Raven, found a savior from disdain.
Your words were gospel, your presence the grail,
Thought this life was hard without you paving the trail.
I heard their whispers and their warning bells,
But on my sleeping wings I continued to sail.
Such a believer of the spiritual realm,
Thought you were my mother, and I, your child unspelt,
My family, one so long withheld…
I should’ve learnt to stop back then.
I should’ve never let you win.
I should’ve never let you be,
My savior, mother, best friend in need.
But see love it always works so different,
Nobody sends you in with a handbook to print.
I dealt with so much that I’ll never talk about,
But I’d watch you smile, ‘twas enough to kill the doubts,
But through it all a tide of sorts had happened,
Pretty bird no longer chose to be shackled…
Found the voice inside bedazzled,
Sleeping wings were soon untangled,
Raven, in all her glory, had unraveled…
I know how hard that voice was to find,
And harder still for you to redefine,
All of what you thought of me,
All the ways in which “we” were designed.
And then time came for more unravelling,
Things you had berated me for,
Were things you couldn’t help but want more…
Imagine my unrestrained surprise,
When parts of you turned into me undisguised.
But even as I dealt with new twists in the tale,
These were not things that had sealed our fate.
See I thought you won’t be playin’…
Thought you knew how I “know” things without you even sayin’…
But I couldn’t deal with all the lies….
Somehow I couldn’t even try to hide,
That I knew of things you’d kept from me,
Though they came from you being finally set free.
And free you were… and fly you did…
Building memories you will always reminisce…
But I could no longer deal with counterfeits.
And so I quietly just made a snip,
Knew you’d find a way to make the slip.
Slip away you did so artfully,
I needed out of this despondency.
‘She’ talked me through it week after week,
Reminding me, my wings were no longer asleep,
I could find my way without the family that leaped,
And your journey was yours to turn or repeat.
See I’d never wish you anything but well,
And this ending’s probably just as well,
In the end I tried to make amends,
Wished you weren’t one of those that fell,
But there was too little, not enough to spare,
And in the end, the truth had itself declared.
I’ll keep your secrets to the very end,
As we both live out as our souls intend…